How time flies. Christmas is once again just around the corner. I have always loved Christmas. It always gives me that warm and cosy feeling which I savor. But then again, it also makes me feel a year older too.
I was actually quite stressed up over the weekend to prepare for the biopsychology module … stressed to the extent of wanting to get it done once and for all and bury the textbook and the notes. I was trying to make sense out of the notes and textbook with my course-mate on Sunday, but seeing the way he was forcefully memorizing his notes had increased my stress level a few notches higher until I decided to abandon him and move to another location myself but still within the NP campus.
I needed solitude. I needed to be alone. And when I found the open-air alfresco dining area under the shady trees outside the Makan Place, I glued my butt there, with my notes. And that was when my ipod was playing this song, “winter snow” featuring Audrey Assad and Chris Tomlin. Jazzy, slow and easy. Audrey sounded like Norah Jones. I loved it. I decided to close my eyes and let the song repeat itself for next 20 minutes on a breezy Sunday afternoon. No students, no dining crowds (the food court wasn’t opened). If I wanted to find a place of solitude on Sunday, this is one of such places. I hoped that 20 minutes would soothe my troubling soul and bring my stress level down a few notches. Naturally, when I decided to stop the song, reality came rushing in like a tidal wave and I had to face the stress again. I was still contemplating whether to do it or skip it, but something tells me to go for it.
Anyway, I decided to take the morning paper with the make-or-break mentality. I just started scribbling for 2 hours, skipping those parts I don’t know how to answer and try to smoke my way through those I could. Don’t ask me how easy or difficult the paper was because my emotions were numb and I really didn’t know what I was writing. But after my paper was submitted, I heaved a big sigh of relief. Peace reigned for a while before the hard truth – that I still have another paper to tackle this Thursday. I had done all that I could. I managed to scribble something even if the answers may not make any sense at all or bad enough for the marker to read it as a stress reliever and guffaw through the night (I know who the marker is and I will spam his FB if he ever tells me that).
And now, I’m taking a quick break typing this entry, before I start to cramp all the theories into my brain in a little while more.
And as what Audrey Assad and Chris Tomlin had sung, there were no mighty storm or hurricane, there were no tidal waves or or a roaring floods, there were no burning bushes or chariot of fire flying across the sky, Heavens did not sound a hugh pompous fanfare or broadcast a worldwide announcement …. but while people then were daily struggling to survive the harshest realities of life and waiting for God to perform a big bang miracle to lift us out of their problems with a finger, Jesus just float into our world silently like the winter snow, working quietly to redeem mankind.
And as I was busy coping with my stress and finding ways to do well for my papers, hoping for an immediate relief of stress and a massive impartation of understanding and knowledge from Him to me so I can soar high in my exams – He has quietly slipped into my heart like a winter snow, quietly taking care of the rest when I have done all that I can. And I am still learning to trust him like that while it can be nerve wrecking.
If you are also in the same predicament like me or stuck in a dilemma and trying to find a way out or asking God to work a miracle with just a snap of a finger, you don’t have to wait till Christmas Day. Just call and reach out to Jesus, that winter snow might have quietly slipped into your heart before you know it.
Be blessed.
(Performed by Audrey Assad and Chris Tomlin)
Could’ve come like a mighty storm
With all the strength of a hurricane
You could’ve come like a forest fire
With the power of heaven in Your flame
But You came like a winter snow
Quiet and soft and slow
Falling from the sky in the night
To the earth below
You could’ve swept in like a tidal wave
Or an ocean to ravish our hearts
You could have come through like a roaring flood
To wipe away the things we’ve scarred
But You came like a winter snow
(Yes, You did)
You were quiet
You were soft and slow
Falling from the sky in the night
To the earth below
Oh, no, Your voice wasn’t in a bush burning
No, Your voice wasn’t in a rushing wind
It was still
It was small
It was hidden
You came like a winter snow
Quiet and soft and slow
Falling from the sky in the night
To the earth below
Falling
(Oh, yeah)
To the earth below
You came falling
From the sky in the night
To the earth below
